Confused and British

Continuing with our designer extravaganza, and figuring when in Europe, today Style Diva's going to review British designer Jane Wilson-Marquis. Born in Britain, years of experience, this that. Her website's got couture and ready to wear, and while nothing is outstanding and there are some duds, I can't really make up my mind about this one. Would I buy any of her dresses? No. Are they so ugly humanity should be spared the waste in fabric? For the most part, NO. Judge for yourself-I've picked out some do's and some don't-you-dare-wear. Most of the duds came from the couture line. Hmmm.

In:
Kind of pride and prejudice, British country side. Different and lovely.

Style Diva's not a fan of sashes. But for a simple dress, this one is a winner.


This one might be a lapse in Style Diva's judgement, but something about it just speaks to me. Maybe it's the hip bow. Just glad to see it not on the ass. The second one reminds me of my mother's wedding dress, so it's IN.



The OUTS:

At first glance so pretty.....

And then we see the bottom. What happened Julia? Did the skirt get all bundled up in the laundry? No time to straighten it out? Maybe the local dry cleaner could have helped? I have the number of a really good one....


Umm, not really sure what happened below. Is there a gale-force wind in the studio? Will the dress act as a parachute should a Tornado come through and whisk the bride away to Oz?





She just couldn't help herself. Little bunny foo foo hopping down the aisle...


Great if you were getting married in Italy. In the 16th century. In a forest full of elves. And talking animals. Could also be great to wear to a Renaissance Festival! Seriously!

Project RUNAWAY FROM THAT DRESS

This week usher's in designa-hating here at Wedding Dress Obsessed. Having spent the weekend perusing obscure and not so obscure wedding gown designers, Style Diva is increasingly worried about those of you dropping major $$$ on designer gowns when the are just as, if not more so FUGLY than perfectly affordable FUGLY at David's Bridal (although Style Diva will admit there are a few cuties at David's).

While Style Diva isn't particularly happy about hating on her own peeps, but I feel compelled to start with Olga Kvitko Couture. Ms. Kvitko, originally from St. Petersburg (yes, yes, Style Diva is an ex-communist too), apparently moved to the U.S. in 1990 and even worked as an assistant designer at Valentino and has oodles of other accomplishments. It almost hurts me to say this, but maybe Ms. Kvitko should have stuck to designing pants-a pair of which she claims were her first sale, at the age of 15.

While a few of the dresses were tolerable, but then the Fugly just outweighed the maybe-I'd-wear-this-if-I-got-married-in-the-communal-farm-barn looks. Sorry, comrade, while certainly original, maybe you should have left some of these in St. Petersburg. (all photos are from Ms. Kvitko's site).

Paws down for TomKat

I have tried to avoid it, but apparently, it is inevitable that I must comment on this topic. The TomKat wedding, and more precisely, the dress(es) Katie Holmes wore to marry the cruise-control has obviously been off for the past couple of years Mr. Tom Cruise. Even still, the photos are everywhere, and so I cannot help but but in my two meow's about the attire she-kat wore on the glorious day.

Apparently, like her other famous wedding blow-out Melania Trump, Ms. Holmes (or is it Mrs. Cruise now?) decided that one uber-designer, uber-expensive, and possibly chic wedding dress wasn't enough, so she turned to her "friend" Giorgio Armani to design the entire wedding "wardrobe", which apparently included not only the dresses for the wedding, but the honeymoon outfit, and clothes for all the kids (all this info I learned from People magazine online-all of the photos except the sketch are from People online).

I found the sketch Armani made of the dresses on a blog that I understand is run by people who actually LOVE the couple and fanatically follow their every move-TOMKATCRAZY!

Let me ask you this, do you know of anyone with those body proportions? Whose legs are about 4 times as long as their actual torso? And arms that easily fall down to their knees? I mean, I realize this is just a "sketch" and having watched "Dawson's Creek" during a time in my life I'd rather not admit to, I know Katie is really tall, but come on Giorgio!

The "ceremony" dress, in real life, did turn out to be not so much of a dazzle. In particular, we are really left to wander what in the world that fringe-like thin is at the top front part of the dress. On the sketch, you could almost miss it, but in a close up photo of the happy couple (again, let me apologize for subjecting you to this wedded bliss), the weird fringy thing looks much like some weird upper body chastity belt or perhaps a fancy bib to catch Suri's drool, or maybe Katie's if she nods off during Tom's pontificating on how much he loves her, and church, and himself, and Oprah. Look, he cannot even lean in to kiss her, he can only touch her with his nose, because the all powerful chastity/drool collar is protecting Katie from Tom's onslaught. That was pretty smart of you, Giorgio, looking out for Katie like that, but I gotta tell you, if someone showed me this dress trying to convince me to hire you to design mine, you would so be Fired, or not even Hired!

To those of you who may be despairing on Giorgio's behalf, and also thinking that maybe I am a little mean in my assessment-after all designers are artists and so we cannot expect the ordinary and mundane from them, I do think Giorgio redeems himself with the wedding reception number. Although I could not find a photo that showed the dress in real life in it's full splendor, it does look very beautiful-the soft color, the one shoulder Greek goddess look-my hat is off to you Giorgio on this one, and I have to say, I guess Katie does have some taste if she managed to wear at least one pretty dress, although to be honest I would rather have seen her wearing it in a wedding to Chris Klein. Remember him Katie? He was hilarious in American Pie, and more your age! And as a side note to Katie and her planner, how matchy-matchy can you get? We get it, you like roses! But really, do we need the roses on the cake, and the table, and a rose bush?

In any case, to summarize Style Diva's take on the TomKat wedding-just like their relationship, it looks almost pretty, but something is definitely off with this number.