Paws down for TomKat

I have tried to avoid it, but apparently, it is inevitable that I must comment on this topic. The TomKat wedding, and more precisely, the dress(es) Katie Holmes wore to marry the cruise-control has obviously been off for the past couple of years Mr. Tom Cruise. Even still, the photos are everywhere, and so I cannot help but but in my two meow's about the attire she-kat wore on the glorious day.

Apparently, like her other famous wedding blow-out Melania Trump, Ms. Holmes (or is it Mrs. Cruise now?) decided that one uber-designer, uber-expensive, and possibly chic wedding dress wasn't enough, so she turned to her "friend" Giorgio Armani to design the entire wedding "wardrobe", which apparently included not only the dresses for the wedding, but the honeymoon outfit, and clothes for all the kids (all this info I learned from People magazine online-all of the photos except the sketch are from People online).

I found the sketch Armani made of the dresses on a blog that I understand is run by people who actually LOVE the couple and fanatically follow their every move-TOMKATCRAZY!

Let me ask you this, do you know of anyone with those body proportions? Whose legs are about 4 times as long as their actual torso? And arms that easily fall down to their knees? I mean, I realize this is just a "sketch" and having watched "Dawson's Creek" during a time in my life I'd rather not admit to, I know Katie is really tall, but come on Giorgio!

The "ceremony" dress, in real life, did turn out to be not so much of a dazzle. In particular, we are really left to wander what in the world that fringe-like thin is at the top front part of the dress. On the sketch, you could almost miss it, but in a close up photo of the happy couple (again, let me apologize for subjecting you to this wedded bliss), the weird fringy thing looks much like some weird upper body chastity belt or perhaps a fancy bib to catch Suri's drool, or maybe Katie's if she nods off during Tom's pontificating on how much he loves her, and church, and himself, and Oprah. Look, he cannot even lean in to kiss her, he can only touch her with his nose, because the all powerful chastity/drool collar is protecting Katie from Tom's onslaught. That was pretty smart of you, Giorgio, looking out for Katie like that, but I gotta tell you, if someone showed me this dress trying to convince me to hire you to design mine, you would so be Fired, or not even Hired!

To those of you who may be despairing on Giorgio's behalf, and also thinking that maybe I am a little mean in my assessment-after all designers are artists and so we cannot expect the ordinary and mundane from them, I do think Giorgio redeems himself with the wedding reception number. Although I could not find a photo that showed the dress in real life in it's full splendor, it does look very beautiful-the soft color, the one shoulder Greek goddess look-my hat is off to you Giorgio on this one, and I have to say, I guess Katie does have some taste if she managed to wear at least one pretty dress, although to be honest I would rather have seen her wearing it in a wedding to Chris Klein. Remember him Katie? He was hilarious in American Pie, and more your age! And as a side note to Katie and her planner, how matchy-matchy can you get? We get it, you like roses! But really, do we need the roses on the cake, and the table, and a rose bush?

In any case, to summarize Style Diva's take on the TomKat wedding-just like their relationship, it looks almost pretty, but something is definitely off with this number.